Category Archives: Lighter

More than having something to say everyday, I’ve learned that I always have something upon which to reflect. One of my very favorite Bible verses is Roman 12:2, which states, “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.” Committing to write each day in turn has committed me to witness God move through the world—my world—each day.

Participating in a 5K didn’t necessarily bring me closer to God, but it was a straightforward example of how easy it is to make a choice. Taking action is not just exciting, but holy.

Because integrity demands consistency across the board, thriving on whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable.

I think dedicating a day to rest is so admirable, a goal to which we should all strive. But seeking Sabbath in glimpses each day…now that’s holy. When we pause to absorb all that God’s doing around us, we are able to fulfill the most rewarding, basic component of relationship: gratitude.

There have been so many times I’ve wanted to end this commitment of writing every, single day, but I see the benefit of keeping up a discipline. Yes, my writing has had the chance to flourish and I’ve been able to take more risks, but more than anything, it’s proved to me that sticking with ventures that bring me closer to Christ are worth the investment.

Here’s where I’ve gotten it all wrong, though: these sins are not the act of backtracking one’s grief. That’s not how grief works. Sins are lying to oneself that feeling sad or upset is wrong. It denies the opportunity for those closest to us to love on us, to save us from our own sin of self-shame.

I want to curse and throw up and cry and just get a straightforward answer to, “How?” How is this possible, in this day and age? How can one human being commit such atrocities ​to another human being? And then I ask, “Why?”

Why does God allow this suffering?

For as long as I can remember, my Grandpa would give me “Easter money” to buy a new dress. Since his passing earlier this year, I’ve built up in my mind how important it is to continue this tradition. (So noble of me to give myself a reason to buy a new dress, I know.​)

Even when the situation is healthy, I have still found myself feeling drained by historically effortless achievements. A social setting like tonight that was fast-paced and well-attended would’ve thrilled me beyond compare, but I caught myself retreating several times out of friendly exhaustion.

I may not be great at turning Hinge matches into actual relationships, but you can be sure as hell I’m filled with actual, authentic peace tonight. Because for every area of my life where I feel I’m failing, my relationship with Jesus is still solid.